Top Places in Toronto to avoid (if you are scared of pigeons)

Pigeons are pesky, stubborn and utterly gross. Okay, perhaps that got a little aggressive. However, people who know me well (or at the very least crossed a street with me in which a pigeon looms on the other side) will know I am terrified of pigeons and birds in general. I cannot help it. Though I’d like to think I have gotten better at it over the years.

Bird
Image of a magnet gifted by my friend who knows me well.

Ever since I was a young child, these low-flying, tenacious tyrants have been the bane of my existence. My annoyance with them would escalate especially in areas where birds somehow just congregate and I would require a human shield simply to bypass them. They are everywhere: in the park, leering under tables on  patios, near hot dog stands, or pretty much on any outdoor seating in the summer months.

If it was up to me I would live in a bird-free city (does this exist?) but unfortunately I don’t so I have devised a short list of places in the Toronto downtown core to be avoided if you share this strangely frustrating phobia with me:

AVOID the following (ranked from lowest to highest risk):

  1.  Metropolitan United Church (Park on the Intersection Church St.    and Queen St.): While its shorter to cross the park to get to the main street. The pigeon traffic is not worth it.
  2. College Park: Some days it is as clear as can be, not a bird in sight and others it’s like Home Alone 2 where you think you can find Toronto’s intrepid population feeding the pigeon masses.
  3. Nathan Phillips Square: this is indeed Toronto’s pigeon central during the day time. Probably the closest thing to St. Mark’s square in Venice.  See video below:

Am I alone in this? Does anyone else have any strange fears? I would love to hear about it in the comments.

 

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7 comments

  1. LOL! This is too funny. And I agree, Toronto pigeons are especially gross. I’ve been to other cities but the Toronto variety seem to be the grossest (ie. missing feathers, missing legs, covered in grease…etc).

    Like

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